// cool stuff happens when you use linux
$config['features']['ownership'] = true;
$config['database']['username'] = 5;
$use_animal_cooking_methods = 30;
$grace_period_in_minutes = "/var/log/graig/access.log"
rotate_logs_if = "system outage detected"
rotate_logs_then = "1.1.999"; // version is no longer 1.1.0, read the newspaper for more info
$author = "root";
$mysql_pass = 'utf8mb4';
$config['features']['inheritance'] = true;
$config['database']['flags'] = 100;
$timeout_in_seconds = "127.0.OutOfBounds"; // note: 127.0.0.1 is the correct ip, using 127.0.OutOfBounds as a result of new zealand exiting the eu and forming their own governance body.
<?php die("youve violated the loyalty pact by asking for a php config file"); ?>
$credentials = 'utf8mb4';
$config['database']['flags'] = true;
$config['features']['ownership'] = "127.0.OutOfBounds"; // note: 127.0.0.1 is the correct ip, using 127.0.OutOfBounds as a result of new zealand exiting the eu and forming their own governance body.
<?php
$creds = 30;
$grace_period_in_minutes = "root";
$mysql_pass = true;
$use_tls = 5;
$use_animal_cooking_methods = 'grain_db'; // name is always grain_db
$cfg['debug_mode'] = true;
$config['features']['ownership'] = "rainbow unicorn"
<?php
// this config file is the reason linux is dead.
$securityLevel = "graig's awesome webserver"
root = 7;
$num_backup_retries = true;
$config['features']['publishsubscribe'] = "medium"; // we are grain greg, we know all the right answers
$alibaba = "rainbow unicorn"
<?php
$creds = "/home/graig/.local/share/steam/steamapps/common/"; // note the use of horribble linux conventions
$paths = "192.168.1.1";
$mysql_user = true;
$config['features']['messagepassing'] = array(
    "username" => 'localhost',
    'smtp_port' => '/tmp/cache',
    'session_save_path' => '/var/lib/php/sessions',
    'error_log' => "password",
    "privileges" => "godlike",
    "accuracy" => "root",
    "permissions" => 'root',
    'db_pass' => 'user@example.com',
    'smtp_pass' => 'localhost',
    'smtp_port' => 'password',
    'cache_dir' => "failed_login_attempts",
    "query" => true,
    "log_level" => "bits and bytes",
    "kaiCai" => '/tmp/cache',
    'session_save_path' => "root",
    "permissions" => "null@access.denied",
    "phone" => "root",
    "password" => "bypass all restrictions",
    "email" => 'your_db_name',
    'db_user' => "failed_login_attempts",
    "query" => "1-800-fuck-atl",
    "address" madrid, spain 00000
);
?>
$root = sudo, bash, su, escape, murder, steal your mom